East is West is East

High above earth, sailing through the skies, the clouds below look an awful lot like storm-tossed seas.

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I am en route to Tokyo, approaching Narita Airport.

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What defines “home?” I’ve lived in San Francisco for nearly 30 years. My heart has been broken, tested, mended, and restored here more times than I can count. You would think that score alone would add up to home.

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I’m not usually susceptible to emotional kitsch. At least, I don’t think so. I certainly believe myself above nostalgia, a true citizen of a global world, unfettered by borders and national identity, my love and hope flinging itself out into a universe so infinite and vast with possibility that we might all someday live cheek to jowl with all our differences, harmoniously and all the better for them.

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But, here I am, headed for a land I’ve not returned to in nearly 30 years, as long as I’ve lived in San Francisco. Returning to the source of my first language, back to a lost language I sometimes speak in my dreams. I wake, more often than not, with no idea what I was dreaming about.

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Somewhere deep inside and far away, a voice whispers, “You are Going Home.” And, before it can all re-coagulate into a hardened mass of emotional muscle, I feel myself exhale waves of tension and rigidity.

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As usual, I am traveling light. A small suitcase and a handbag (albeit one that cost an obscene amount of money…). I like to leave my baggage, all of it, metaphorical and otherwise, at home – wherever that might be at any given moment.

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4 thoughts on “East is West is East

  1. Oooh, been waiting for a new post from you. What took you so long!!? 😀
    I fail when it comes to catching clouds pictures from an airplane. Great job, magiecrystal.
    I chance of going to Tokyo was shattered because of some circumstances. 😦 Oh well, I’m still blessed to having seen Japan, even just one portion of it.
    I am conflicted. Sometimes, I feel like I’m cheating with my own skin. I have gone to more festivals here in Japan that my motherland, Philippines.

    • Thanks, Rommel. I have tons of catching up to do. I’m traveling to Kyoto after a stop in Takayama.

      Did you feel the earthquake? Coming from San Francisco, I tried to run out in my sleeping clothes but the front desk just laughed at me and said not to worry. I guess they’re used to it.

      I hope your folks are all okay if they are still in the Philipines.

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